I lost the man i truly loved
I met this guy named Nick in a chartroom. and unlike most conversations with people from chartrooms we actually talked and learned a lot about each other and talked everyday for hours online. and then came to find out that we lived in the same town went to the same high school for 2 years yet we didnt know each other until now. So then we started calling each other and the first time as always was awkward but we started getting more comfortable and called each other every night and honestly talked about anything possible for a minimum of an hour, one night we even talked from 10pm to 5 in the morning it was crazy so now we decided to meet and we hung out and talked at a nearby park and played basketball and i was so attracted to his personality he was just so perfect but i couldnt come to tell him that i liked him because im a shy girl but online one day i was just so upset with myself that i eventually got the courage to tell him and he told me he liked me to thank god. and so we started talking on the phone everyday as always and i would email him everyday before school and hed write back and then id write him back when i got back from school and we were just so perfect for each other and never argued we were really laid back about everything and i truly fell for him and even though we never told each other that i knew and could see in his eyes that he loved me to but were both shy people so we never actually exchanged those words.although everything was going great he did have a best friend that i didnt mind but cmon if every time u were to hang out with someone you loved would you really want his friend to always be there…..his friend was always with him and at times it would piss me off but i never said anything. So one day online his friend ims me and starts saying all these rude things to me and from just being so mad about it i said things back to defend myself and after this argument i knew that everything i said i never meant and im not one to argue but piss me off and i will say things you never imagined id ever say to anyone. and so he misinterpreted everything i was saying and decided hed tell nick all about it.and Nick of course believed his best friend even though everything this best friend was telling him was nothing i ever said. and so for the first time we were arguing about something that his best friend started and i came to realize that if he wants to believe his friend then he can but i was just upset because he wasnt listening to a single word i had to say and he wanted me to call him the next day and wed talk about it all and i did and as soon as i said hi the response from the other end of the phone was hello stranger he thought i was a totally different.person that he thought at first and i wasnt but when someone says things to you you have to defend yourself and that conversation i never got to say anything because nick and his friend were to busy saying pointless things to me and i apparently wasnt told to call to talk and so i hung up cuz i was sick of it all. and from that day on things havent been the same and we dont talk to each other anymore, even though we r friends on facebook. And he is now in the army, and i lay in my bed every night crying because i lost the man of my dreams and hes probably not even thinking of me and i dont understand why i still love him and after a year of not talking to him i still cry over him everyday and it kills me inside to know that we probably wont ever talk to see each other again.Ive been wanting to write him an email about everything and how i still love him to death but what if he doesnt feel the same and doesnt care? i dont know what to do, any advice will be greatly appreciated. i just feel like i did everything for him just to make him happy and show him how much i cared and i did it all for nothing now, i never got anything in return and i think hes scared of a commitment and maybe hes just not ready i dont know but i dont want to lose him but i want to know if he feels the same way about me as i do about him.
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One Response to “I lost the man i truly loved”
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Hello! my advice is, tell him what is in your mind and in your heart.. even if he says he didn’t love or like you anymore, atleast you finally tell him what you feel.. And when the time comes that he realizes that he still love you, he will come back to you knowing that you feel the same way too.
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