It started out as a regular summer. I drove into Kentucky expecting nothing amazing or spactular to happen. well i then met him. with his amazing blue eyes and those arms that i still feel oh so safe in. well it was a summer romance, or it was at the time. he was my first kiss, although i never spoke a word of this to him. i felt foolish for i was thritteen when my first kiss happened. along with my first makeout. which he was as well. although my mother didnt like Jake too much though. she had even threatened to send me home early. she thought him to be to touchy and sort of disrepectful. which hurt me so much that my mom didnt approve of him because i had realized to me this started to be more than a summer romance. it blossemed into a relationship. and i loved every minute of it. but the sad part, i had to leave. and we broke up for neither of us were crazy about long distance relationships. i was crushed. but Jake and i made an effort to stay in contact and be friends. we talked on the phone at night and texted alot during the day while we were at school. then i went back in septemeber for a weekend and this was when i told him i loved him for the first time. he said he loved me too. he always had but he was scared to tell me because he meant it and he says he still does to this day. but im not so sure anymore. because now he has a girlfriend. [[not that either of us said we couldnt date other people. i never thought of dating anyone else but Jake.]] i dont want to keep him from his happiness. even though hes told me a few things about her and i must say i dont like what i hear. i just grin and bare it i guess. but it kills me to know hes with her. then the truth came. he cheated on me when we were going out over the summer. but he says its the worst mistake he has ever made in his entire life time. and that he loves me so much. he hates to see me hurt and it was a terrible mistake. im not sure if i can trust him anymore. im not sure if when he says hell always love me, if i can believe him. even though i still love him. i know i do because of everything that we went through together. im so scared if let him go. i feel like ill be losing a big part of me. and i cant help but wonder if he feels the same. like what would happen if we just stopped talking. if we stopped making the effort to stay as close as we are. uhgg i dont know if i should even trust him? or if i should just let him go? or what would be the best for him, because thats all i want. i want to know of his happiness. thats all thats important anymore. that hes happy.
Karez was always a top student in their class since from her elementary years. She was always used to have everybodys attention because of her good looks, intelligence and good family background. Everybody thought how lucky she was. But little did they know shes broken inside. Even wanted of death for her to come.Back when she was young, she was always afraid of guys due to their differences in thinking. She always have had girlfriends and felt uncomfortable to be with guys. She rarely talked to guys. As she entered high school life, there she felt having a crush to a chinky eyed guy. To make it short, they fell in love but it took 5 months for him to get Karezs sweetest yes. But it only took 2 months for their relationship. Karez realized she wasnt ready yet for this stage in addition that her parents would not allow her having a boyfriend. They were still immature that they just even dated once with friends. They were still in the shy type stage. Karez found out that the guy cried to her best friend and felt really loved because of its tears but still decided not to pursue their relationship. That was summertime.When school days arrived, she felt the same again to that guy, as if she felt in love again to him. Not knowing the guy courted her unexpectedly she wanted to say yes but doubtful because she thought it would be just still the same as before so she just said to him to wait for her. Months passed but it seemed that the guy is not in love with her anymore. One afternoon Karez received a text message from unknown. She did not reply for she wasnt a text maniac. But the sender just texted her consistently. It was Mcken, a guy from a higher year. Days passed and they texted and texted but still she like the other guy and decided to make him jealous by letting him hear about Mcken but he was just ignoring her. Karez just did not know when did she fell for Mcken all she remembered was her day wasnt complete if she cannot receive a message from Mcken. Mcken courted her and still took him for almost five months to have her sweetest yes. They had rough relationship for first months but still both of them love each other and tried to work it out even in a long distance relationship. For Mcken had to study his college years in another place. They expressed their love thru text messages and phone calls and sometimes Mcken would visit her during holidays.The day came when they had a big fight and decided to break up officially. Karez just found herself a feeling of abyss of emptiness in her whole life for not having him anymore, she even wrote poems that filled one notebook that expressed herself, missing him so much, loving him more and more everyday and everything she felt for him.Karez was still not allowed to have a boyfriend, her parents and elder sister strongly objected about it that it might ruin her studies. And to be prepared for a medicine course. But for Mcken she lied just to be with him. She even preferred their sisters fight because of Mcken than to lose him, respectfully to her late grandfather, she did not attend her grandfathers wake just to be with him, she even lose some friendships with other guys just to please him, thats how she loved Mcken.The chinky eyed guy named Lin knew about their breakup and decided to court her again. Karez was shocked and amazed for Lin waited for her silently for three years. Lin promised her that he would love her more, respect her more and everything than Mcken could do. Karez knew Lin was true ever since but Karezs heart only belongs to Mcken. For her, what she felt for Lin before was just an infatuation. She even felt guilty when he just talked with Lin. For she love and respect Mcken so much that she would not and never betray him. He stopped Lin to court her for she had still high hopes to be together again with MckenShe lowered her pride and texted Mcken that her feelings are still the same for him. She texted all sweetest words that a guy wanted to hear from a girl but Mcken just seemed to be different. They just argued and he even said to her to forget about him. But for Karez leaving him is always a failure. Days had passed and they did not communicate.Karez changed a lot she was always depressed, pretending to be happy outside, even dropped out in the top 10 list of honors, always cried at night, devastated, even dared to be absent in classes and everything that shocked her loved ones why shes like that already. She cannot take it anymore so she just texted again Mcken after how many weeks. Mcken just said to forget about him.Karez cried all night and day that nobody can ease her pain. Her heart is broken into pieces that cannot be fixed anymore. Karez tried to be happy with her friends even going out of town and trying new adventures in life to forget Mcken but of those experiences, in her mind is still him that how great to be with him and experience all those things together.She is still waiting for him even how she received pains and always bleeding from him. She really loves him. Still him. Still waiting. Her love for him is true and immeasurable. Isnt it sweet? But still have to learn to move on. _December 5,2007_
I just started working in the big city. Everthing is so new to me. I had a great job, exciting life. And I just broke up with my x-bf from my small home town due to some distance relationship, causing me feel lonely. I met this guy, S during my job. He is 9 years older that me. At first I never thought that I will fall in love with him so deeply. I started to think about him day and night. It even make me woke up in the middle of the night, just by thinking of him. S is such a nice guy, very caring, sweet talking and yes, he treat me super nice, when Im sick, he even take care of me, giving me all the loves and needs. But… S told me that we will never be couples. There are severals reasons that he give: 1. S was almost getting married but the marriage was called off after the brides run away 2. S will never believe in real love anymore 3. S has business plan and will leaving here soon. What about me? S told me I will always be his close friends… That was so so hurt.. I cried over and over again. Nothing will do to change his mind. I feel like giving up now, but I really love him
From one kind deed to another, from one argument to the other, i always have the reason to stay and to keep on believing but now after the last few drops of tears have dried, i have finally found my place out of his life.Ive met him when i was just new to this company, we were just chatmates at the start, and later on we started texting, i was comfortable with his company and i ejoyed every second of our conversation.During that month of january, it happened that i had an appointment at his place, so we had time to met and finally get to know each other, to my surprise it became the start of a romance i dreamed of, in my entire life.I could still remember how we spend the entire day laughing, window shopping, eating and how we enjoy just in bed and teasing each other.It was the happiest time of my life,thats why when i was on my way to my place,i feel i left my heart their.Having long distance relationship didnt stop us to communicate, in fact our relationship became so strong.He was always the man i would admire because of his honesty, being gentleman and him being so nice, he was really a great person inside and out.no more no less.It was in the mid of this year when our relationship became so rocky, we have argued often, we have misunderstanding and we were really put in tests. I still dont knew why it end up that why, seeing each other in the arms of people we never thought, will be in the picture. I know i can be blamed of all the failures,i had other party as well, and i forgot to value our relationship.I was overconfident that he would never leave me.but when i heared the news that he has his new girl, i fell the pain..i feel the deep regret.Missing him was that the hardest part but the thought that i once had him, is what breaks my heart.Honestly, i still do love him and he would always be my man. But right now, the best time to heal all wounds is time, at Gods best time,hopefully.I remember during that night when we talked about what happened, he told he already tired, i said can we give it another chance, though i know he wanted too,,,but i understand he wants us to grow.He wanted first to make us mature,i was deeply hurt by his decision to part ways.but i know it would be for the better,,If it means that he would be happy with someone else, i would be willing to set him free thou it means im not part of it.I remember my friends telling me that wounded knees are easy to heal that broken hearts, but still i never had any regrets, coz i know i have loved..and someday i look forward in Gods best time where i can find a new dawn of love, a dawn of love that forever be mine.