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Trying Hard not to miss him

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by Beverly D. Calma

I once promised not to fall until i graduate from college.It was because i once loved somebody who fails to even notice me, or my existence in our class.This was when i was in High School. But Suddenly, as i admit to have been born to love, i happen to meet this guy who made me feel special among everyone else.

It was kinda wonderful to be treated as if you were the most fragile thing in the world and you were handled the most delicate way he can. I couldn’t resist his offer and gave in into it after 4 months i think.

At first i thought to have made the right decision only to find out that i was up for something so devastating and awfully painful!we lasted for a year and broke up on the exact date of our anniversary.

Its just so ironic that just a year a go, on the same date and time, i thought to be the luckiest girl alive, but just a year after, i turned to be the most wrecked creature ever exist.

Totally wrecked deep inside!Why?it wasn’t because he fell for another girl or that i did something wrong, it was because he was uncertain of himself and i presume he had already fallen out of love.I can’t imagine how i bear the pain, but i did.

I’m still alive until now.Memories do consume my soul for quite a time but i am trying to slowly stand again.I would bravely admit that i still love the guy so much!I still even dream of walking in the aisle after him.hmmm but for now, i have to love myself first.

i have to continue life.He still text me, call me at once but i see to it that i am now in control of my emotion.I miss him.yeah i do!So much ! But i guess i have to try hard not to, i’m afraid it ill lead me astray. I was hurt terribly once, i’m afraid it will happen again.

So now, i try my all to ignore the feeling inside if i want to succeed.He had left me not just once but for a lot of times already.I guess its enough.
Learn how not to ignore men but understand how men thinks and keep him attracted to you.

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