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Fake Love

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When I love it’s not just fake love I literally love the guy. My friends tell me I’m stupid for falling in love so seriously, but I cant help it I rarely feel the love anymore. My life’s not really that fun.

People likes me because of what I was before, but that girl wasn’t me, I’m the crazy, hyper, flirty, 14 year old girl. I changed my self for a guy that I fell in love with when I was in grade 8, I was dumb. Now I’m looking back at the times while I wasn’t me, when I was dating him. Here’s the thing I fell in love very seriously, and guess what…. got my heart broken. After 3 months of happy one moment can change everything. Love sucks, but we don’t say that when were in love, right????? The biggest mistake I did was asking for an unforgettable love. The guy I went out with almost a year ago (on October 24) is still the same guy that”s in my heart. I told all of my friends that I’m over him.

But that was a lie. I also sucked at lying when me and him broke up. As much as I wanna get over him, I cant. I did like other guys, but his always in my heart. I wanna stop loving him, but I cant, whenever I try I end up losing, everything makes me think of him. I love him. My best friends know that I’m still not over him, but I could only blame one person right now….. ME. If I saved my relationship with him and me and him would still be together, and I wouldn’t be here typing this story, I would be texting him now.

But don’t we say things happens for a reason, well I’m still waiting for my reason why I’m crying right now, why I’m still not over him, why I’m crazy for a guy that would cry for me, why? Right now I probably sound stupid but falling in love is a part of our daily life, you fall in love, then you get heart broken, that’s how it usually goes, right?? maybe not for everyone but for me that’s my routine fall in love and heart broken.

I don’t know what to do. The guy I love is my friend now is this how my relationship is suppose to go with him??? We’re friends but I want more than that, I wanna be with him, I wanna be his baby again. In our 1st month anniversary he got me a necklace, and in our 2nd month anniversary I got him a bracelet that has his name craved in on it, he gave my a teddy bear.

When me and him broke up I gave him back the necklace and the next day he did the same with the bracelet, I pretended not to care but I did on the inside, but now I realized I sick of pretending, I pretend to be a happy person even though I’m crying in the inside, I pretend to be tough even though, I’ freaking out in the inside, I’m tired of lying, that’s my point. And I’m tired of gettting my heart broken. Got any advise for me and my life, go give me some…..


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9 Responses to “Fake Love”

  1. rhosette on October 3rd, 2009 1:49 pm

    everything you said was right…thats the reality of loving..in a moment, you are happy but in the end youll be in an unbearable pain…´but hen you are still too young..lot of things will still happen…there are also lot of guys over there worhty enough of your love…someday somehow, you´ll forget about him…dont tell me that you cant..you can if you will..hearts are resilient, right?

    Reply to this comment

    fixes Reply:

    yeah ,,ur right,,but somebody tel us that first love never die,,

    Reply to this comment

    panda Reply:

    you’ll always value your first love, that doesn’t mean that it should be your last love though

    Reply to this comment

  2. fixes on October 15th, 2009 7:59 am

    hehee..nice story…

    Reply to this comment

  3. shubham on October 16th, 2009 2:57 pm

    just 1 thing to say, love really hurts,
    but if it is true love then everybudy wants to be get hurted in same manner as u are…

    Reply to this comment

  4. panda on October 17th, 2009 6:28 pm

    I’ve been through this,
    one thing that always helps is to admit it telling him that you really love him and that your gonna need a lot of time to get over him might help you.
    But it’s always nice to let your friends know whats really going on it helps, that way they can tell you need time to be yourself again

    and yeah people always say that loving someone so young is stupid at this age but it can mean so much at the time and it just feels so wonderful

    Reply to this comment

  5. sheila on November 5th, 2009 9:32 pm

    My best friend would understand.He loves me.He tries to flirt with a girl to make me want him,he keeps me company when i get lonley(When my friends leave me,which is always)he sits next to me at lunch,or across from me and says were on a date,when i walk to turn my hw in,he tries to get my attetion by making noise,and when i look at him,he smiles.He always makes my happy when im mad or sad or whatever.He makes me laugh,and he always know what to say.I cried in math class because i had an F in my class,and he said “It’s ok,i bet there are people who failed this grade,but your soooo smart,i know it,ive seen it,if you wernt,youd be held back and youve never been held backk because your too smart for alot of people.” He made me confident,and he even offered to study with me.But I always get sad when i think of this fact,I don’t love him back,I love someone else I’ve only known for 50 days,and i’ve known the nice man since 3rd grade(were in 7th grade right now).I liked him back then,but he became my friend instead,but now HE likes me!If only id liked him longer…

    Reply to this comment

  6. Kira on January 2nd, 2010 9:12 pm

    Im 13 Nd I Hav Had De Same Experience As Yhuu
    I Went Out With Sum1 All Summer Nd Wen School Started He Dumped Me:(
    The Breakup happened September 09 Nd I Still Havnt Got Over Him:(
    Wen He Left Me He Took A Part Of My Heart Nd Soul Nd I Still Havn’t Got It Bk Because I Kept Thinking He Would COme Bk But He Didn’t
    I Still Love Him Just Like I Did Lst Summer,Because I Am Completely Irarevicably In Love Wit Him…Or So I Thaught,untill A Couple Of Days Ago,My Friends Convinced That He Wasnt Worth Waiting 4 That It Was His Mistake
    I Only Just Realised That Because It Took Me So Long 2 Realise that,That it Will Take Even Longer even Longer 2 4get Him Especcially Since Were Friends;(

    Dont Make The Same Mistake,Dont Let Him Break U 2 Pieces
    I Still Havn’t Got That Piece Of My Heart Bk From Him But I Will Let You No Soon As I Do<3</3
    “Death Is Easy,Life is Hard''

    Reply to this comment

    Kira Reply:

    Just Dont 4get 2 giv Himm his Heart back;)
    xxxxxxx

    Reply to this comment

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